5 Stages of Being Single in Your Thirties

In her 1969 book, On Death and Dying, Swiss-born psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross outlined the five stages of grief of someone who is dying:
• Denial and isolation: “This is not happening to me.”
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• Anger: “How dare God do this to me.”
• Bargaining: “Just let me live to see my son graduate.”
• Depression: “I can’t bear to face going through this, putting my family through this.”
• Acceptance: “I’m ready, I don’t want to struggle anymore.”

The list was praised and criticized by grief experts. Some said the stages got people expressing their emotions; others said the stages were too rigid.

I thought these stages are adaptable to some of us sisters who’re still single in our thirties:
• Denial and isolation: “This is not happening to me. The most perfect guy in the whole universe will come rescue me.”
• Anger: “All men suck!”
• Bargaining: “hmmm maybe I’ll settle for this trifling brotha that’s in my face right now. Even though he is shiftless right now, we can work through our issues”
• Depression: “I can’t bear to going through this, I’ll be one of those crazy ladies with tons of cats.”
• Acceptance: “I’m ready, I don’t want to struggle anymore…if it happens it happens.”

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5 thoughts on “5 Stages of Being Single in Your Thirties

  1. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross did some great research on death, loved your not married comparison.

    I truly believe the older we get, the less we ”settle” with whoever’s in the vicinity. I was married far too young. 40 is the age of wisdom, hold out for the wisdom.

    😉

    Like

  2. Totally agree! I’ve been through all the stages and decided to have a baby by myself. Being single in one’s thirties is an absolute nightmare.

    Like

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